Reconciled to the Past

Catholics confess, little girls write in their diaries, and friends confide in each other. I guess it's therapeutic to reveal your secrets or experiences.

So here's a poem about a brief period of my life a couple of years back. Its a longish one because it describes almost in detail about a phase of my life where i went through the most complicated relationship i've ever had. Friendship, love and heartbreak- i had them all.

Cramped up in Delhi, where noise, dust and concrete blocks out all the natural night environment, I've reconciled to the past. But nostalgia woun't leave me. My hometown, where you can still look up in the night sky and see a bright full moon and take a romantic walk along quiet roads illuminated by the night sky. It can play havoc with your emotions, especially if you're with the right companion. Here's my story-

Those nights with you under the velvet sky;
When the moon shined, or when clouds gathered.
No matter what the night bought with it,
We had so much to laugh about,
So much to say and so much to cherish.

The way we talked; the way you talked.
The way you smiled, the abandonment in your laugh
Always wakes my senses, and stirs me inside.

The times we shared, going to places;
Or just walking together along the road
Under the gazing eyes of the moonlight..

Remember those times? Many a night we sat down
And told each other stories.
Sharing laughs in all our follies.
Listening to each other as we told tales
of our deeds and our glories.

We were good friends, we were real friends
We were good together
And the amount of time we spent together shows.

No matter what the night bought with it-
Hot weather, cold winds,
Dark nights, or rain drenched weeks
We were together
And that was all that mattered.

But we didn’t take it to the next level
We couldn’t afford to
The whole world was against us
All the odds staked up like a wall between us.

They were not ready for us,
Maybe we were not ready ourselves.
Two souls so close yet which could not fuse
Too scared, too confused, too true to the world and the system

But underneath it all
The hearts charted their own paths
Pushing their way
Through mazes of awkward emotions


Coming close together. So close, that
There were moments when time stood still;
When everything else in the world blurred into oblivion.

Only two souls existed, two hearts beating
And at these times
The feeling was so clear
So clear that nothing else mattered
Not the criticism of other people,
Not places, nor the system we were living in.

And when the rest of the world surfaced again in me
I became lost in my confusion;
I was lost to the world.

But during those flashes of moments
When you were all that I could see
All that I could think about
And all that I could feel
I had found my place in You.